Mike: Remember how we were discussing if you possibly rank on the autism scale?
Mike: Turns out, you do! "(Homosexuality) is a microform of autism."
George: Ah ha ha. Fabmelous.
George: There’s no way that could possibly be inaccurate.
George: You know, since vaccines have been happening long enough that we would have already seen a significant increase in hot man-on-man action.
Mike: Well, yeah. It's a fucking ridiculous claim, even more so than the supposed link between vaccines and any kind of autism (much less a made-up kind).
George: Oh, hokey science. Will you never cease to come through for me?
Mike: The (god-awful, ridiculous, should die-in-a-fire) Huffington Post has the original article. Nowhere in it it explained what kind of scientist this mook is, only that he is a "scientist, journalist, and opponent of vaccinations" who is "a proponent of alternative medicine."
Mike: I think we can safely ignore this whackjob.
Mike: Still, congratulations on your autism!
George: I'll celebrate by sticking something long and sharp through my eye.
George: Excellent callback.
Mike: I'm sure you can find a more comfortable place to stick something long, anyway.
George: It might be more comfortable, but only because it’d be like throwing a hotdog down a hallway at this point.
Mike: You mean like throwing a toothpick down a volcano?
George: Sort of, in that you’re likely to just lose the whole ensemble in there.
George: More like thrusting a dagger into a greatsword scabbard.
Mike: Oh, like throwing the One Ring into the Fires of Mordor.
George: You’re focused on girth.
George: Focus on length.
George: To put it in terms you’d understand – it’s like the length of Creationist history compared to actual history.
Mike: I see – insignificant, like a speck of dust in the vastness of space.
George: Like tossing a brine shrimp into the Strait of Gibraltar.
Mike: Like a motorcycle in a train tunnel.
Mike: Like an ant in a train tunnel?
George: Aaaannnnd we’re out of time.