Am Not Jesus Christ!

George: Jesus Christ.

Mike: Am not.

George: Are too, deal with it.

Mike: Am not am not am not.

George: Are too. Infinity.

Mike: Am not. Infinity plus one.

George: You can't add to infinity. It's a concept, not a number.
George: Stupid Jesus.

Mike: If I'm Jesus, I'm the son of god, and also god, and therefore exist outside of your reality, and therefore am responsible for all your concepts, and therefore can redefine them as I please.

George: You're doing a terrible job of it.
George: Stupid, ineffective Jesus.

Mike: That's because I'm not Jesus. Stupid etc and so on.

George: This all makes sense all of a sudden.
George: All religions hate homosexuals because Jesus is stupid, ineffective and self-denying.
George: Sorry – all Christian religions.

Mike: To be technical, all Abrahamic religions, by definition, since they are all based on (variants of) the Old Testament.

George: What do you know about religion, Jesus?

Mike: More than you, heathen!

George: That's ‘secular humanist’ to you!

Mike: I will have a witty response once I get to work.

George: Lo, though Jesus promised a witty retort to the correction, none was forthcoming.

Mike: Right – because I'm not Jesus.
Mike: I'm not Jesus, I will not Forgive!

George: Excellent.

About DemetriusOfPharos

Ten things about me: 1) I get bored easily.
This entry was posted in Obfuscation. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Am Not Jesus Christ!

  1. Sam says:

    I have a friend in real life (believe it or don't!) ….. his initials are JC, his father is a carpenter, and his mother's name is Mary. I think the odds are heavier in his favor than Mike's….

  2. @Sam – you make an excellent point.

  3. Acharidel says:

    This sounds it's like just a front to fortify Mike's cover story. For all I know, you were planted in my reality long ago just for this moment.

    …Wow. Mike's a better Jesus than I thought.

  4. Sam says:

    I wasn't planted, I was hatched! Not by Mike though….he's never as much as met me yet.

Comments are closed.